Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Movie Drinking Games

My wife and I enjoy movie drinking games. The way this works is that you pour your beer into some shot glasses, and drink a shot of beer every time a certain condition is met. For example, the rules may require that you take a shot of beer when the movement of someone holding a gun causes unnecessary gun noises.

Usually you can just google "[name of movie] drinking game" and find that someone else has done the work for you. Unfortunately, most of the very best movies do not yet have drinking games made for them. So, it is up to us to create them. Here are a few we have recently made for you.

Rise of the Animals

"Animals across the world have risen up and turned on humanity. A determined pizza delivery driver sets out on a perilous cross-country road trip to reunite with the woman he almost lost his virginity to."

  1. Take a shot every time an animal kills someone
  2. Take a shot every time someone kills an animal
  3. Take two shots when a GPS fails
  4. Chug your beer when a person or animal is delimbed or decapitated.

Bigfoot Wars

"After the sheriff of the small town of Boggy Creek receives reports of attacks from a vicious beast bearing resemblance to the legendary Sasquatch, he enlists the help of an expert survivalist (The Outsider's C. Thomas Howell) and sets out to hunt down the creature. However, as they wander into the wilderness they discover that an entire tribe of Sasquatches awaits them. Now the enraged creatures descend from the hills and into the town to declare war upon its citizens. "
  1. Take a shot when Bigfoot kills someone, or someone kills bigfoot
  2. Take a shot any time someone is called “bitch” or “babe”
  3. Take a shot every time Sheriff Taylor has a monologue or a flashback
  4. Two shots for sledge hammer or machete usage.

Bigfoot vs. D.B. Cooper

"When several young hunters arrive at a secluded lodge in the Pacific Northwest little do they know that they will become the hunted."

  1. Take a shot every time this movie makes you feel weird and uncomfortable.
Only one rule for this movie drinking game. Being from the Northwest we really had high hopes for a movie with this title, but it ended up being about 90% beefcake and 10% gay cryptobeastiality softcore porn so you should get fairly Schlitzed with this one.

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